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We were interrupted by a small yellow lizard scuttling between us. The teapot man whipped out a vial of sickly green fluid and flicked a drop onto the lizard, which immediately swelled to the size of a basketball and exploded in flames.
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“We must be keeping pests out of harvested sand,” he chattered. “Bad, bad lizard! Naughty lizard! See, is only all-natural pesticide, a simple mixture of bat guano and date fertilizer - is very harmless..!”
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“Yes, yes, of course,” I interrupted wearily, “But what we really wish to know...”
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“That is truly true, we are ORGANIC sand farmers, we are never hearing of Weapons of Massive Distraction,” interrupted the birdnest man,” ...and what is moreover more so, my friend there is looking nothing at all like Osama bin Laden, may he be cursed with piles and flatulence..!” he spat to emphasize the curse, and to spatter the top of his packing case.
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“And my friend there, he is looking nothing at all like Saddam Hussein, may the fleas of fifty thousand mangy camels infest his armpits,” blatted the teapot man, unhooking his fake beard to spit out the curse and accidentally gobbing into his partner’s whiskers...
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